Tough skin, tender heart – October 20

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 26, 28; PM Psalm 36, 39; Ecclus. 6:5-17; Rev. 7:9-17; Luke 10:1-16

It’s hard to experience pushback and rejection. Jesus prepares his disciples for it in the 10th chapter of Luke today. The technique imparted by the Son of God is not so much grounded in anger management, but in building emotional resilience. “If any share in peace, peace will rest on that person; but if not, it will return to you.” In essence, nothing is lost. Jesus continues with the work that can be done: when people welcome you, “eat what is set before you; cure the sick who are there, and say to them, ‘The kingdom of God has come near to you.’” This is the work that the seventy are to pair off to go accomplish. They are to spread the news. The way it is received is more about the ears and lives of the hearers. When met with negativity, Jesus imparts another coping mechanism for his followers who are going out to proclaim the Truth: when entering a village that does not offer shelter or food, or hear your message, say, “Even the dust of your town that clings to our feet, we wipe off in protest against you.”

Even with wisdom and techniques for coping, rejection is painful, as it involves some breakdown in relationship. When I finally said yes to follow God’s call to seek ordination, I left behind a 15-year career in public health and wellness. I called to tell a long-time friend that I was quitting my job, selling our house, and moving my family to Texas to attend seminary, and eventually become a priest. (Granted, this is a bit of a bombshell to relate on a long-distance phone call.) On the other end of the phone, there was first silence, then uncertainty, and finally, words of discouragement: “You don’t want to do this…This isn’t a good idea…I just don’t see this working out for you.” I felt stunned. Frozen.

If I had it in my sightline, having this reading from Luke might have helped fill that space of surprise and hurt, building my resilience. What also comes up for me in reading this passage is the reimagined Serenity Prayer in Resurrection Matters: Church Renewal for Creation’s Sake by Nurya Love Parish:

“God grant me the wisdom to know what I can change, the courage to act for good despite my fears, and the serenity to accept what I can neither change nor influence.” (45)

I love Parish’s invitation to embrace prayer-driven action first, assessing what we can change. Next, have courage to do the hard work. Then, serenity and acceptance of difficulty follow after all other options are exhausted. Dusting off our feet is a last resort, when nothing else can be done. Jesus prepares his followers like this, too. We are being sent out to labor for the Kingdom of God. We being are sent out, emotionally vulnerable and spiritually strong. When facing criticism, I cling to the mantra of the late Rachel Held Evans: “tough skin, tender heart.”

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

Think of a time when you were rejected or dismissed. How did you respond?

Remember a time when you were the one criticizing someone. What would you change and what would you do again?

Daily Challenge

Through the lens of Luke 10, remember a time in your life when you want to wipe the dust from your feet, leaving behind rejection. Write down three things you have learned from that experience. Give thanks to God for your strength and your vulnerability.