Renew a Right Spirit in Me - October 30
Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 40, 54; PM Psalm 51; Ecclus. 34:1-8,18-22; Rev. 13:1-10; Luke 12:13-31
Today’s Reflection
Athanasius observed how, “Among all the books, the Psalter has certainly a very special grace… that within it are represented and portrayed in all their great variety the movements of the human soul. It is like a picture, in which you see yourself portrayed and, seeing, may understand and consequently form yourself upon the pattern given.”
Some passages from Scripture we have heard or read so many times that they may lose their impact. Psalm 23 or 1 Corinthians 13 come to mind. Similarly, Psalm 51 is another passage that we have heard so many times that, on the one hand, we feel a certain comfort in its familiarity, and in that way we feel happy when encounter it again and again in our Common Prayer.
At the same time, speaking from my own experience, I have read parts of Psalm 51 so often as part of Morning Prayer or the shorter Morning Devotion in the Book of Common Prayer that, in order for it to continue to wash its meaning over me in a way that lasts, I have to make myself stop and re-read it. I re-read it in part because I need to hear what it is saying to me and the way in which it is helping me to understand myself in relationship to God.
But I also force myself to stop and re-read those lines more slowly, pausing between them to let them sink in, because I want what I am praying in those words to be my prayer:
Have mercy on me, O God… [pause] Cleanse me from my sin… [pause] Create in me a clean heart… [pause] Put a new and right spirit within me… [pause] Restore to me the joy of your salvation.
What we learn and find evidence for as we pray Psalm 51 is that our mistakes—our sins—hurt God because we are in relationship with God. As James Mays observes, “Only where people believe that their life is lived in the presence of God, is a gift of God, is summoned and measured, is responsible and accountable to the One who is the source of life—only there does sin as experience and language rise.”
So, when we read here in Psalm 51 that the psalmist has sinned against God alone, this tells us that the psalmist and God know each other. We cannot hurt someone (well, not as deeply, anyway) if we do not know them. So, whether we are talking about David repenting of his misdeeds, or of us repenting of something we “have done or left undone,” God knows about it, cares about it, and is disappointed about it because of being in relationship with us.
This reminds me of the dynamic when I feel disappointed when another family member does something that runs counter to the expectations of how we treat one another in our family—or their disappointment when they see me not following through with something I promised I would do for them. If I never spoke to or interacted with them, then we would probably have less opportunity for conflict. The fact that we do disagree or disappoint or hurt one another does point to the fact that we are living with and actually interacting with each other—we have conflict and disappointment to repent and forgive because we are in relationship, because we have a closeness between us.
Yes, I mess up daily—family life is the main occasion for mistake-making in my life. As a parent and as a spouse, I see that I am constantly falling short in terms of patience and kindness—but I can admit my wrong and be forgiven, and I can model the same to them when they repent of whatever thing they “have done or left undone.” This allows us to have a close relationship as family members, even though we disappoint each other and make mistakes in how we treat each other every day.
Love is what allows us to hold in creative tension a close, caring relationship—between us and God, and between us and our neighbor—with sin, repentance, and, ultimately, forgiveness. Psalm 51 is about repentance. But Psalm 51 is mostly about love—the love of a God who wants to stay in relationship with us, his imperfect yet perfectly loved children.
—Becky+
Questions for Self-Reflection
Which lines in Psalm 51 resonate most with you? How do hear yourself and your own relationship with God reflected in the psalmist’s words to God?
Daily Challenge
Take some time today to reflect on what it might mean for God to create in you a clean heart and a right spirit. Would praying each day for God to renew your clean heart and right spirit change the way you approach the responsibilities and relationships entrusted to you?