Showing Up For Each Other - July 30
Today’s Readings: AM Psalm [70], 71; PM Psalm 74; Judges 4:4-23; Acts 1:15-26; Matt. 27:55-66
I can still remember answering the phone. I was a youth minister and had served the church for about three years at that point. It was 6:30am and I was awakened by the vibrating on the nightstand and the flashing name of my boss, the Rector of our church. Mark was calling to let me know that a parishioner had not awakened from her sleep, the mother of three of the youth in my youth group. “I’ll meet you at the house,” he said.
I can also remember feeling totally unprepared for that moment. I was the king of silly games and creating church trivia and orchestrating the world’s finest Messy Olympics. Staying up at lock-in for hours on end or planning a ski trip was a breeze, but I had yet to handle any serious pastoral concerns, and the death of a parent was a first. I remember the dread of not knowing what to say, or even worse, wondering what would happen if I said the wrong thing.
Mark met me outside and walked me to the back porch. I sat down next to the two oldest and we just sat. Not a word was said for what felt like an hour of time. I am sure it was much less. Finally, the oldest child said, “Thank you for being here.”
Today’s Gospel is the account from Matthew of the end of the crucifixion. Jesus’ is left on the cross, then taken down when it is evening and his body is placed in a tomb. I find it interesting that the author makes note that “many women were also there, looking on from a distance.” And when he is placed in the tomb, and Joseph of Arimathea leaves, Mary and Mary Magdalene are there, sitting in the tomb. They just show up. The text simply says, “sitting opposite the tomb.” I wonder about their grief and how much each of the Marys, who so loved Jesus, must have felt and the comfort that they brought each other in that painful place. I wonder if the women looking from afar would have brought calm and peace to each other in that moment of death and despair.
Our world seems as broken as ever these last few months. Maybe it has always been this painful and broken, and technology is now able to open our eyes to the reality of sin and brokenness. I keep wondering how we will fix or relieve the pain of others, how we will heal the divisions we have made, and mend the ripping of the common fabric of our nation.
It strikes me especially this morning of the profound power of the women in this text, specifically the Marys, who show up for each other. They don’t try to change the outcome, or come up with a plan for new leadership, or find the next steps of living after Jesus. They just show up for each other. Maybe we are being pushed to consider that in all of our desiring to change the outcomes of the world, we might be paralyzed to respond. Or worse, when we try to take away others pain, or anger, or justify what has caused it, we are missing the opportunity to pause, listen, and be present. Maybe all that is really needed is the presence of each other in our common life together.
Showing up is a little bit more difficult these days, I’ll admit. But maybe we are being invited to consider how our presence in the world and each other’s lives is far richer and more important than we may have ever considered. Instead of trying to take away someone’s pain, we need to learn and listen. Maybe we just need to find out how to be a little more present to each other and let God do the rest.
- John+
Questions for Self-Reflection
When someone says something difficult, how often do you respond? What is a profound moment of healing that you have received as a result of someone else’s presence?
Daily Challenge
Practice the pause and don’t respond technique today. Here are a few options of things to say: “That sounds very X” or “It sounds like you are feeling Y”