Being Wise with Our Words - October 16
Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 16, 17; PM Psalm 22; Ecclus. 1:1-10,18-27; Acts 28:1-16; Luke 9:28-36
Today’s Reflection
“They hold back their words until the right moment; then the lips of many tell of their good sense.”
–Ecclesiasticus 1:24
Earlier this month, Pope Francis released a long public letter (or an encyclical, as it’s called in Catholicism) that he titled Fratelli Tutti, which means “On Fraternity and Social Friendship.” Coming in at 73 pages in length (plus 20 pages of notes), it’s clear that Pope Francis believes this is a subject worthy of much reflection for Christians around the world.
Francis spends much of Fratelli Tutti reflecting on political and social charity as well as conflict and forgiveness, laying the foundation for what he calls “a better kind of politics” based on “dialogue and friendship in society.” As he observes, “Approaching, speaking, listening, looking at, coming to know and understand one another, and to find common ground: all these things are summed up in one word ‘dialogue.’ If we want to encounter and help one another, we have to dialogue. … Unlike disagreement and conflict, persistent and courageous dialogue does not make headlines, but quietly helps the world to live much better than we imagine.”
Francis’ focus on the need for what he names as “authentic social dialogue” strikes a chord with me not only because this is the subject I spent years exploring through my research and teaching, but also because of what we see unfolding around us in this most contentious of political seasons. If we are to have “generous encounter[s] with others,” Francis argues, we must strive to ensure “there is genuine dialogue and openness to others. Indeed, in a true spirit of dialogue, we grow in our ability to grasp the significance of what others say and do, even if we cannot accept it as our own conviction. In this way, it becomes possible to be frank and open about our beliefs, while continuing to discuss, to seek points of contact, and above all, to work and struggle together.”
In the field of rhetorical studies, we had a concept called “listening rhetoric” that sounds a lot like what Francis is describing. As Wayne Booth defined it, listening rhetoric encompasses “the whole range of communicative arts for reducing misunderstanding by paying full attention to opposing views.” In listening rhetoric, the point of exchanging ideas in dialogue is not to win the other person over to your own way of thinking. Rather, the point is to nurture mutual understanding—and reduce misunderstanding—for its own sake.
Our reading today from Ecclesiasticus (also known as the Book of Sirach), one of the apocryphal wisdom books included in the Septuagint, is written in praise of wisdom: “The root of wisdom—to whom has it been revealed? Her subtleties—who knows them?” Sirach tells us that it is the Lord who created wisdom, “he saw her and took her measure; he poured her out upon all his works… he lavished her upon those who love him.”
As Sirach continues to describe what wisdom looks like, once poured out into those who love the Lord, he moves into a consideration of the way that people who are wise are able to control their emotional responses as well as what words they choose to say and at what moment they choose to say them: “Unjust anger cannot be justified, for anger tips the scales to one’s ruin. Those who are patient stay calm until the right moment, and then cheerfulness comes back to them. They hold back their words until the right moment; then the lips of many tell of their good sense.”
As Christians, it is well that we reflect—especially amidst all the political and social conflict that has been so magnified in 2020—on what our responsibilities are as we participate in public discourse. Whether we are posting comments through social media, writing a letter to the editor, or engaging in personal conversations about current events, we have an obligation to conduct ourselves in a worthy manner, not just in what we say and how we say it, but also in how we listen and remain in dialogue with those with whom we disagree. As our bishops +Kee Sloan and +Glenda Curry emphasized in their word to the diocese earlier this week, we need to “remember who we are and whose we are.”
This Sunday morning, in our adult formation hour, we’ll be exploring this topic further as I will lead a class on “Speaking the Truth in Love: Following Christ in our Public Discourse.” I hope you will consider joining us, whether during the livestream from 9:00-9:50 am on YouTube, or by viewing the recording later whenever it is most convenient for you.
—Becky+
Questions for Self-Reflection
Do you tend to engage in or to avoid discussions about potentially contentious topics? What in your experience has led you to engage or avoid in this way?
Which topics of conversation make it most challenging for you to “stay calm… and hold back your words until the right moment”?
Daily Challenge
Seek out an op-ed column, a podcast, or a speech by someone who has a decidedly different viewpoint from your own and allow yourself to read it and digest it for what it is. Did you learn anything new about that person or their point of view?