Open Wide Your Hearts - May 25
Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 45; PM Psalm 47, 48; Deut. 12:1-12; 2 Cor. 6:3-13(14-7:1); Luke 17:11-19
Today’s Reflection
We have spoken frankly to you Corinthians; our heart is wide open to you. There is no restriction in our affections, but only in yours. In return—I speak as to children—open wide your hearts also.
–2 Corinthians 6: 11-12
On most Wednesday nights this past fall and spring, I had the chance to gather with different combinations of people from around Saint Stephen’s to discuss a wide variety of books. Some of the books we read talked about societal and cultural issues, like how Christians have responded to the pandemic (NT Wright’s God and the Pandemic), or the transformative power of social connections on our individual and collective well-being (Vivek Murthy’s Together), or on how we can strive to create unity that flows from an appreciation of our diversity (both Michael Curry’s Love is the Way and Emmanuel Acho’s Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man).
While the overt purpose of a book group is to discuss a book that we have all committed to reading, the more important, underlying purpose of a book group is to share conversations on things that matter and, in so doing, to form (or reinforce) friendships as we get to know one another. And so, because of this, some of the people I have gotten to know best over these first 10 months or so at Saint Stephen’s are the people who have been a part of these Wednesday night conversations.
I would say that some of the books we have had the best discussions around have been the books in which the authors opened up about their personal experiences, which, in turn, gave us opportunities to share our own stories. Sometimes we felt the authors’ experiences really resonated with ours and we saw ourselves in their stories (and in one another’s). And other times, the authors’ experiences seemed very dissimilar and disconnected from our own—and we reflected together on why that was and how we could learn from those stories, too. Reading Anne Lamott’s Dusk Night Dawn, written in her typically vivid, transparent style of life-writing sparked both appreciation and sometimes cringing in response to her open-book approach to sharing about her life. But we all agreed that Lamott sees this honest sharing her life experiences—of addiction, of difficult family relationships, and of other struggles great and small—as her way of sharing the gift of what God has taught her through the book of her life.
Another author who shares very openly about both her challenging and joyous life experiences is Kate Bowler. Back in the fall, we shared conversations about her book Everything Happens for a Reason—and Other Lies I’ve Loved. At age 35, Kate Bowler was “living her best life” (or “Instagram gold,” as she jokes now) with a tenure-track job at Duke Divinity School, an academic book underway (necessary to earn said tenure), and with a much-loved husband and toddler son at home. And then one day, she found out she had stage 4 colon cancer—and everything immediately turned upside down.
She had rushed from the Divinity School campus, where she had been teaching earlier that day, to the Duke University Hospital. They wanted to rush her into surgery that very day. And in that moment, as she waited for her family to arrive, she looked down at what she was wearing and had a moment of realization: “I can’t do anything but sit staring down at my dress, white with bright flowers and flouncy the way I like it. I love this dress. I can’t take it off. I need it for teaching.” Then her good friends arrived with hugs and concern, and she turned to them and said, “I’m going to need for you to burn this. … I can’t see it again. That life is over.” And at that point, she remembered her son Zach, back at home, and “I double over crying. I squeeze my eyes closed and try to shut out the world.” Her friends listened to her and prayed for her, but before they left, Kate put on the hospital gown and as she wrote: “I hand her the dress. She knows what to do.” The book is filled with these very honest moments in which Kate grapples with the most heart-wrenching situations, ones that turn her to equally toward self-deprecating humor and reexamining what she truly believes about God—not just from an academic perspective, as a professor of church history, but from her personal experience of living through this unexpected time of crisis for herself and her family.
In today’s reading from 2 Corinthians 6, Paul shares openly with the Corinthians about the many layers of struggle he and his co-laborers in the Gospel have been going through in their lives. They have been and continue to endure “afflictions, hardships, calamities, beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless night, [and] hunger” (6:4). After pouring out his heart—not unlike the ways in which Anne Lamott and Kate Bowler pour out their hearts through their books—Paul comes to this realization: “We have spoken frankly to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open to you. … In return… open wide your hearts also” (6:11, 13).
Paul’s letter to the Corinthians reminds us that following in the way of Christ has never been easy. Being a Christian does not mean our life will be free of trouble and sorrow—far from it. But one thing we have is the sense of belonging to a community in which we can (if we allow ourselves to be vulnerable) open our hearts to one another—and in so doing while we may sometimes feel, like Paul, that we have nothing, we, in fact, possess everything.
—Becky+
Questions for Self-Reflection
What stories in your life have you found (or do you find) difficult to share with others? When have you shared a painful experience with someone and found healing in doing so? How have you received someone else’s stories when they have showed vulnerability to open wide their hearts to you?
Daily Challenge
Listen (or re-listen) to Brene Brown’s TED Talk on “The Power of Vulnerability” and reflect on how you might live into vulnerability in the relationships and circles in which God has placed you.