"My Well is Dry, and that's Okay" - July 8
Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 18:1-20; PM Psalm 18:21-50; 1 Samuel 16:14-17:11; Acts 10:17-33; Luke 24:36-53
On Monday morning, I awoke at 5:15 a.m. to start writing my reflection. Sometimes I write in the afternoon or evenings, and sometimes I get a late start with an exceptionally early morning. A fun celebration on the 4th of July after a full day at church had me waiting until the next morning.
I’d been thinking a lot about independence and freedom, had even prepared by reading the Declaration of Independence and as I sat there in front of my computer screen, the words stumbled off my fingers. I tried to write about freedom (I had just preached about this the day before). I typed words from the readings, and the special collects for the day, and cut excerpts out of the Declaration of Independence. I worked through a full pot of coffee.
An hour and a half later, I looked at my computer screen and for the first time since March of 2020, I closed Microsoft Word with nothing to show or share. I drafted an email to Katherine and Becky, saying “My Well is Dry” but decided not to send that either. And I left for a long bike ride on a beautiful Monday morning
For most of the morning (and on and off this week), I have felt guilty. Writing multiple times a week for the past year and a half has been a huge gift, a practice that has shaped my own process for reflection, forced me to spend more time in Holy Scripture, and been a vehicle for creativity and contemplation. It’s a practice I plan on upholding for as long as I can, one that I hope will last much longer. Honestly, I’m a little embarrassed that I couldn’t make everything work on Monday. My own self-reflection is a reminder about how easy it is to value our self-worth on what we can produce, or accomplish, or achieve.
Today’s Gospel is the very end of the Gospel according to Luke. It is an account of the Resurrection. In a way, the disciples are commissioned to go forth living into the reality of the truth that had been revealed to them. I like Luke’s interpretation because he reminds the disciples that they “are witnesses of all these things.” It’s not up to the disciples to create content, produce value, start something new, but instead to be witnesses.
You and I are not wrapped up in this crazy story of Resurrection and God’s love because of what we can do or produce. We are a part of this movement of faith because of what God has already done. It’s a helpful reminder. Take a day off, skip the meeting, ignore the email, and remember it’s not about what you can do, but what God has already done. We are witnesses and that is good enough. I’ll try to believe it too.
John+
Questions for Self-Reflection: Where are moments lately that you haven’t been able to accomplish what you set out to? What role does ambition, accomplishment, and pride play in your ego? How do you understand God’s call to be witnesses of the Resurrection?
Daily Challenge: Let go of something you are supposed to do today. Instead, read a passage of Scripture, call a friend or loved one, and offer to pray with them.