Cock-a-doodle Denial – July 23
Today’s Readings AM Psalm 50; PM Psalm [59, 60] or 66, 67; Joshua 9:3-21; Rom. 15:1-13; Matt. 26:69-75
When our family lived in Huntsville, I occasionally took the kids shopping with me at the local Kohl’s. Though I went for a focused reason, we would inevitably wander over to the toy section, conveniently located between the toddler boy clothes and the restroom. (What an ingenious trap of commercial upselling set for beaten down parents and their energetic children!) While in the mire of “I want” and “I need”, a shrill chirping noise began sporadically sounding. The best I can tell, it came from the area of the emergency exit by the toy section. Perhaps it was a door or smoke alarm that was malfunctioning? Whatever its genesis, it was annoying and happened each time we were there.
It was bothersome to me; it also got the attention of my kids. Robinson was probably 2 ½ years old when we first heard it, and he would ask, “Why that noise, Mommy?” And then he grew disquieted. The high-pitched beep scared him. He wanted to go home. “That creeps me out,” he says, even today, of that sound. That repetitive sensory experience was enough to break the toy-grabbing desires of a tiny tot.
It is a sound foretold by Jesus that rouses Peter to awareness in the gospel from Matthew today. Not an electronic beep, but the crowing of a rooster. “Before the cock crows, you will deny me three times,” Jesus says.
I can imagine sitting near Peter, in the darkness and swaying shadows of the courtyard, outside with the warm breeze blowing. Can you hear the noises of the earth and of the people in it? At this hour, Jesus is undergoing examination in a trial by the elders and chief priests. Peter has followed along from a distance, to stay informed of what is happening. As he waits near the guards, people are milling about. A servant-girl recognizes him and says, “You also were with Jesus the Galilean.” Peter dismisses her assertion. He moves to a different location outside the house and another servant-girl says to folks around her, “This man was with Jesus of Nazareth.” The second denial: I do not know the man. A little more time passes, and darkness and denial are enveloping Peter, who earlier in the evening had stated so clearly to Jesus, “Though all become deserters because of you, I will never desert you.” The third denial comes. And the cock crows. Peter weeps.
Have you been awakened by a sound or sensory experience, to face a painful truth about yourself that you’ve been avoiding? I have. It is disquieting and gut-wrenching. It’s like a tear amidst the fabric of who we think we are. It can be devastating. And yet, Jesus calls us back. Jesus offers redemption and reconciliation. Jesus loves us, just as he loves Peter. Though you may be facing a hard truth about yourself or the world around you, know that you are loved.
And so, it is time for me to stop. Robinson has walked in making the “ding-a-ling-a-ling” sound.
-- Katherine+
Questions for Reflection
What sound quickly gets your attention?
What is the voice or gesture you use to get the attention of others?
Daily Challenge
Pray that God opens your eyes to something you’ve been in denial about. Ask for the courage and patience to explore that space, and perhaps ask someone (friend, spiritual director, counselor) to help you in that soul work.