Confession time – July 24

Today’s Readings AM Psalm 40, 54; PM Psalm 51; Joshua 9:22-10:15; Rom. 15:14-24; Matt. 27:1-10

“I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me." Psalm 51:3

Church has been a place of comfort for me. The cadence of the week was brightened by Sundays worshiping at the Church of the Ascension in Montgomery. I have memories of leaning against my dad, nestled against his side, while services were conducted. My sisters and I would sit on needlepoint kneelers, drawing on bulletins with stumpy, eraser-less golf pencils. My mom would gently put her hand on a shoulder or knee to indicate the whispering was not so quiet.

There was a time, however, when the connection and experience of church became deeper for me. I believe it was Holy Week, leading up to Easter…but my memory on the exact date or occasion is foggy. (I was probably about 10 or so.) What I do know is that there was a service of confession that happened. People could go up to the altar rail for prayers and absolution. I watched some folks file up to the front to kneel. There were tear-stained faces as parishioners trickled by to their seats. The light in the sanctuary was bright yellow. And I felt moved to go forward but was stuck. My family was rooted to our pew. My dad was on the outside. But I decided to go up to the altar. I cannot really name why…I had no specific wrong to name. I simply felt a tugging within me, and a need to kneel. The words from Psalm 51 resonate deeply with this memory: “I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.” Though I could not put words to it, I could feel the 10-year-old sins rolling around within me. And so, I pushed past my dad and went up. I do not recall what I said, if anything. I can remember bowing my head and tears streaming hot down my cheeks. And as I returned to my family, I felt cleansed in a different way.

I wonder how Judas felt as he went to turn himself in, confessing of his wrongdoing: “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.” He handed over the payment for betraying Jesus to the authorities. Did he feel some measure of weight was lifted from his soul through repentance? I feel great compassion for him today.

Friends, sin burdens each of us. How are you called to wrestle honestly with those sins before you today? Know that you do not wrestle alone, and nothing can separate you from the love of God.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

How does sin tug on you, or trip you up? What actions do you take to confess wrongdoing and make amends?

Daily Challenge

Think of someone you have wronged. Make a confession to God of that sin and ask God’s forgiveness. Pray also about how you might make amends.